They burned the bridge and asked why I don’t visit anymore.
There are times like these when I’m staring at the night sky, listening to crickets and envying their simple, dull life. This rant comes after the incidents around made me rethink the fake people in my life.
Three years is not a short time. Three years I have gulped down every time I felt unwanted, every time I was avoided, when I was used for work and ignored for celebrations. It has been three years too late that I started writing this rant.
You give a part of your life to an obnoxious person and they respond by taking it for granted. And what’s worse is that they’ve become so used to doing it, they don’t even pretend anymore. I have this person(s) in my life, lets call them UV rays, because unlike rays of sunshine, they do the opposite. One fine day UV stopped talking to me suddenly…
After getting hints from them through short replies and unethical behaviour towards me (unethical is the polite version of ‘fucking crass’), I finally asked what was wrong. After an hour long discussion, turns out UV misinterpreted me. Wasn’t my fault at all. But in their words, wasn’t UV’s fault either. (Convenient, right?)
This happened time and again and I was used to seeing the puffed up face and used to being the first person to bend and ask what was wrong, first person to even care about the friendship we had. One day after sorting one of the many misunderstandings UV had, I suggested they talk to me directly if there was any problem. And guess what happened next?
You expected it to work? NO! Same old disgusting behaviour from UV. After a point I gave up. And I thought that would be the turning point. Maybe they’ll know that from my side, the foot is down. I thought that maybe if I don’t try, if I don’t look back, if I stop calling out, stop tending to the loose ends of the friendship, they’ll care and make the first move. But my thoughts were never more wrong.
And finally it hit my naive brain. I was with someone who was sucking the energy out of me. The buzzing sound of their ‘vacuum cleaner’ attitude had made me numb. All the peace that I got from my work and the other people in my life was crumpled up by something that UV said or did. Such negative people have the power to suggest a problem for every solution you have. And every day I lay there looking at the wrinkles on my state of mind wondering where the fuck did I go wrong?
And after every ‘sorting the fight out’ session, however hard they tried, all the fake apologies and the fake tears, UV wasn’t going to get the same place in my heart as before. As Rahim said,
The thread of love is delicate, once broken will not be joined. And even if you manage to, there’ll always be a knot.
Day after day UV showed me their true self. And fortunately I wasn’t the only one noticing it. The closest friends had begun to see what a despicable human being they were. From trying to bring obstacles in my way to downright shutting me down in a so called ‘joke’.
For the record, if you say something offensive and then later refer to it as “I was just kidding” you need a hard punch in your teeth. With a baseball bat. By Shaquille O’Neal. Especially when you don’t have the strength to take jokes on yourself. Control your short temper or consider everyone else’s!
And don’t even get me started on UV’s ego. Behave rude to them, they’ll start their silent treatment and puffing their fat face. If they do the same to you, you can’t call it out because somehow or the other they always turn out to be the fucking victim!
It had turned out so ugly that even when my health was compromised, UV didn’t bat an eye. Ignorance is bliss, eh?
In the end, even after three years of this torturous drama, I have questions to these morons:
How many times do we have to break our leg so you talk to us at least out of sympathy?
How many times do we have to get bed ridden so you’ll keep your fucking ego aside and think about our friendship?
How many circles do we have to limp around you so that you have the bloody manners to help us up?
How much part of our bodies do we have to burn to melt that stone heart of yours?
To all the UVs out there: FUCK YOU!
After all, not all the rays in the spectrum are harmful.